Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Reason # 11,397 Why I Hate the Sports Media

Here's a link to the article that caused me to hurl a stapler across the office and subsequently forced me to attend an anger management along with my sensitivity class.

If your too lazy to read it or if you fear that you might also lodge an office supply in the ugly intern's forehead let me summarize it for you: "I'm Dr. Z, I like little boys, I want to suck off Peyton Manning on national television." That's about it. He argues that Manning's six (SIX!, 6!) interception performance was one of his best games ever because his receiving corp was so depleted. Those receivers were not that much worse than what Brady was working with from 2001-2005 and a hell of a lot better than the one's he had last year. Reggie Wayne would be the best receiver Brady every played with before this year, better than Branch and light-years ahead of Reche Caldwell. And I'm pretty sure the quarterback needs to throw the ball well before the WRs even have a chance to catch it. Manning didn't, he couldn't overcome adversity.

The Colts had so many injuries. Blah Blah Blah. Cry me a river. This is the NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE every team has injuries. Z also blames the game on Vinatieri. True, he blew it but if Manning hadn't sucked so bad they wouldn't have needed that kick. He threw SIX interceptions!!!! That is the reason they lost, plain and simple. If Manning had limited his shittiness to even 3 or 4 interceptions they would have won.

Also, why isn't anyone talking about Green Bay running up the score on poor defenseless Minnesota. Up by 27 with 5 minutes to Favre thew a 20+ yard pass into the endzone, had the Vikings not sucked so bad it wouldn't have been a touchdown but still they were throwing it with a big lead in the fourth quarter. Where are the ESPN talking heads yelling about Brett Favre hates America and should be executed? When Favre throws a meaningless touchdown late the commentators say things like, "he's just out there having fun, he's a big kid," but when Brady does it they talk about it like it was a school shooting or something. Give me a break. I hate 95% of sports coverage (which is coincidentally, or perhaps not so coincidentally, about the percentage of time most major sports outlets devote to the NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE.) I hope Chris Berman chokes on a ham sandwich.

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