Friday, October 19, 2007

Human Resource or Ridiculous Goddamn Retard?

Proof that Human Resource Departments hate freedom, or at least have a strong disdain for everything that makes America great:
I'm a head hunter, a recruiter, and executive staffing agent. Basically, I'm a fucking job gangster. I spend my entire day on the phone, having coffee, or eating lunch. All in the hopes of getting myself introduced to the best top-producing, account reconciling, GL trial balance doing, Financial statement preparing badasses that I can. The reason I do this is because, well, IT'S MY FREAKING JOB! It's not a prison sentence, I am not held against my will, I am here because I love money. So, when your title is HR Dong, Human Resource Coordinator, Dickcissle, or something of the likes, then I am assuming, if you are a competent person, you would do your goddamn job as well. When it comes to the point where you realize that you cannot bring in the talent you need, essentially that you cannot manage the resources (humans) that your firm needs, you bring in the big dogs. Headhunters. You pay fees. You invest time and capital. All you have to do from this point on is:

1 Call the recruiter tell him what you need, what you'll pay that person and when you need them.
2 Wait for an email from recruiter.
3 Decide if you like the candidate.
4 Schedule an interview with the Hiring Manager.
5 Ask the Manager what they thought of the candidate.
6 Tell the recruiter what they thought.
7 Cross the candidate off the list or make a fucking offer.

Now we come to the point. If you, as an HR "professional," cannot get the proper feedback to the recruiter within 24 hours of the interview, you hate freedom. You hate freedom because you've realized that the only control you have left is that last piece of feedback, and you hold it like me on the last jelly donut.
Stick to sexual harrassment issues.
Ya bunch of fairies.

1 comment:

Doug said...

Wow not really sure what that was about but I am pretty sure you have a glaring typo in your title. I believe it's spelled "ridiculous" but I could be wrong, my degree wasn't in journalism or anything... I challenge you to a race around the world!